Forgiving Myself by Amy Stroup and Trent Dabbs

 There seems to be a lot of talk going on about marriage these days and exactly what it means. As a single guy in my 20's, I can't even claim to fully understand the purpose and transforming process of marriage, but what I can do is read what others like myself who are currently married or have been married have to say about it. One of my favorite artists of all time, Scott Erickson, recently posted an article in commemoration of his 8 year marriage anniversary on some things he has learned about marriage, and while i would encourage you to read the whole thing, I'm going to post one of my favorite excerpts from the article below, Enjoy!

  "Here’s the truth about all our lives… we are going to fail. And not just fail in baking directions or getting the wrong lightbulbs. I’m talking about a deep deep failure. A deep failure of character. A deep failure of faith. A deep failure of being able to “make something of yourself”. And in those moments, we experience great fear… because the brokeness in us believes that we are only deserving of love if we are deserving of love. This is why vulnerability is scary… because we all believe that we won’t be loved when we are deeply seen for who we are. This is why most of us dismiss God or faith or anything like that. It’s not so much of the unbelievableness of it all, but the unbelievableness of a God that would love us as we are now. We aren’t interested in any spiritual pursuit because we don’t know how to be good enough for those beliefs. This also can happen in love between each other too… because I guarantee you that you will find out things about each other and yourself that you may not have enough love for. That’s the scariest thing about marriage… is that you really don’t have enough love on your own to make it happen. But here’s what happens. When you reach those places where you reach the end of yourself, but you hold onto the commitment you are making right now in front of all your friends and family to never leave…. to never leave… you’ll find there is more love and grace available to you. There is more love for you to give and receive. This is when you get to experience miracles because this is where the divine enters in and shows you the Love that you’ve always believed in but never have experienced. And that’s what we are all looking for… a place to fully belong. I’m not saying this is easy. I’m thankful to be on the receiving end of this. This hasn’t been my best year. I’ve been covered under a blanket of depression for a long time…. and i didn’t have it within me to pull up my bootstraps and be worthy of love. But my wife loved saw me where I was at… and she still loved me…. and being loved in your bottom moments is the way to rise again."